The Mercy of Allah

In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful
Assalamualaikum

I don't know what it feels like to have a broken home. I don't know what it feels like to be called a loser. I don't know what it feels like to be bullied on a regular basis. But I certainly do know what it is like to feel hopeless at one point of a time in your life.

It's a lie to think that you're not good enough. It's a lie to think that you're not worth it. That moment when you step your feet out of your house; there is fear and rejection everywhere. Fear paralyses you. Rejection leaves you feeling helpless and lonely.

Im not here to tell you that I understand how you feel. Nobody truly will ever understand how you feel because it's the truth; nobody ever will. Why? Because both you and I; we're just a part of His Creations. There is only so much that a person can do for you. Ultimately,the only one who would understand you best, would be the Creator. Our Creator. It makes perfect sense doesn't it?

I want you to know that this life is worth living, only if you stop measuring your self-worth based on people's judgements about you. But it's hard not to isn't it?

This life is an interesting one and the human behavior fascinates me a lot. In my nineteen years of live, I've seen the arrogant people. I've seen the cool kids in school ostracising the uncool kids. I've seen and witnessed many of our human race giving up on their lives; simply because they think that the struggle they're faced with is not worth fighting for.

What's my struggle? I am struggling to become a better Muslim. It's a challenge to keep this iman going high and steady every single day. But for some, they might be struggling to gain acceptance into the society.

I used to have a classmate, who is just a little different from the rest. Her fashion sense is out of the world, her jokes are lame, and she speaks in a weird slang although she is one hundred percent local. She speaks her mind, but her opinions are often disregarded by many; simply because she's 'different' from the rest.

Naturally, nobody would want to be her friend in class. Because it is uncool. Nobody would eat with her during lunch. Because the popular kids would tease you if you do. My question for you; why do we always have to constantly worry about what others might say?

If you're pursuing after something good, then just do it; no matter how uncool it may be. But if you're into doing something bad just because it is the coolest thing to do, then there should be a cause for worry.

This has to stop. We should live a life being confident in doing what we know is right & is permissible by the syariah; without fearing about what others might have to say. Screw all the 'what ifs'. Gather your spirits back up again and start doing something good today.

In whatever that you do, do it with one intention. Do it to please Allah swt and everything else will fall into the right place. But why do we have to please Allah?

I want you to close your eyes and think. Assuming you are nineteen this year just like me; ask yourself. What have I achieved in the past 19years of my life? Think of all the many achievements you have accomplished. Who made that possible?

Then think about all the dark moments of your life in the past 19years and ask yourself; were you able to overcome those periods? Who made that possible?

& now, look at where you are standing today. Still breathing, kicking, alive, & healthy? Who made that possible?

Can't you feel His touch of love? Can't you see His Mercy for you? Can't you see that He is actually trying to reach out to you? & how well are you responding to that? Or are you just ignoring Him, completely? )':

Sigh. Even as I am typing all this out, my heart is filled with deep regret. I have committed many sins, and out of the many sins that I've committed; I don't know if Allah has forgiven me for any. But the very fact that he has kept me safe and healthy until today; shows that with His Mercy, He is giving me the chance to crawl, walk, run & do whatever it takes for me to reach to the door of repentance before I face the Angels of Death. Ya Ghafur, Ya Rahim..Aiyaaa gonna cry already! ):

You see, for as long as Qiyamah has not happened; there is still hope for you to amend the way of your living. All the reason more; giving up should never be made an option in whatever that you do. Husnozhon.

Take some time off your busy schedule today and reflect. This life is worth living. Renew your intentions, recite your shahadah, find your life purpose and most importantly, PRAY.

Say: O my servants who have transgressed against their own souls, depair not of the mercy of Allah. Indeed Allah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Most Forgiving, Most Merciful. [Surah Az Zumar 39:53]

The soul still seeking for peace,
Suhaidah Amran