Facebook or Fitnabook?

In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful

Assalamualaikum

Title: Facebook or Fitnabook?

I have been thinking about this matter for quite sometime now. & boy oh boy; finally, finally, finally. Alhamdulilah, I've finally come to a fixed decision. What with all that 'stalking business' that I had to deal with recently, I thought to myself: Okay I'm going to have no more of this. No more, no more of this crap at all.  I've had enough and that's that. It's about time that I lay low for the time-being and maintain a low-profile.

I've decided to let Facebook go. I probably have become so attached to Facebook that I fail to realise that it is actually my very first step of moving towards the edge of a cliff. I forgot about my principles, my sensibility and most importantly, I've forgotten about my Lord.

Honestly, it is not an easy feat to give your whole heart and soul towards Him alone. We are humans and we do have some attachment towards the world and we really cannot help it. I can write this down for myself but then, we are forgetful lots.

Sometimes, I can't even fathom how, I could spend hours and hours on Facebook for nearly every single day. When I log on to Facebook, here's what I would do: Accept friend requests, reply to wallposts, wish people happy birthday and then scroll on to the newsfeed. & when I'm bored, I'd come up with some really crazy, funky, funny status updates that'll gain tons of likes from my contacts and the most likes that I've received so far is close to about 60. That's quite a record, I thought. On average, most of my status updates would gain at least a minimum of 5 likes. & then it'll slowly build up to 20 likes, and sometimes even more.  

I like the feel of excitement that I get each time a Facebook notification pops up at the left side of my computer screen and it reads something like; ABC likes your status. And then 3 minutes later, XYZ and 13 other people likes your status. And then 5 minutes later, DEF commented on your status. And it goes on, and on, and on, for God knows how long.

Recently, I thought about my doings on Facebook. I took a look at all my photo albums that I have uploaded on Facebook. I've got 34 albums in all to be exact. Out of the 34, I had only made 6 of the albums open for all to see. And out of the 6 albums, none of them had a picture of me in it. Well except for the 'profile picture' album, there are tons of 'me' in it; hijab-ed. Now that I look at it, I can't help but to feel disgusted with myself because I realised that there is really not a need for me to post pictures of myself on Facebook, freely for all to see. It makes me feel like I am so full of myself! O Allah, what was I thinking? So guess what I did? I hit the privacy button and changed the viewing setting to 'only me'.

& then, I spent hours reviewing all my status updates from the past months. I calculated the total number of likes. As I scrolled down the screen, this was what I saw; 21 people like this. ABC and 33 others likes this. View all 18 comments. And so on and so fourth. Looking at the great number of people who had 'liked' my status, almost nearly hindered me from deactivating my Facebook account. Oh but I'll still be deactivating Facebook anyway and I couldn't be more than bothered, to bother about who is going to like my status anymore. Probably 65% of my status updates is that of an Islamic one, while some may appear to be rather silly and funny. I always would get many 'likes' & I have to admit that sometimes, I get a little riya'. How little, is little? Wallahualam. What that may seem little to me, may not seem little to Allah. Astaghfirullah. ]=

& at this rate I'm going, I don't know how I am going to face Allah s.w.t during the Day of Judgement. I feel so dirty, stupid and silly. I have only myself to be blamed for letting Facebook walk all over me. So I guess that this will be it. I will be officially deactivating Facebook by this Sunday, at midnight. I don't know if this is going to be a temporary deactivate or a permanent deactivate. If my eeman is strong enough, I hope this would be a permanent deactivate. Meanwhile, I will still remain active on my blog.

At exactly about an hour ago, I put up a Facebook status that went something like:

I will be officially deactivating my Facebook by Sunday night. Meanwhile, I will still be active on my blog. You can still reach me via my mobile and prolly at my email too. I'm leaving Facebook for good & I hope that I won't be back on this site, ever again. I realised that I am pretty much bad at time management and I just can't let Facebook to destroy my life any further. So I'll be going on a 2 years long Facebook vacation. So see you bunch of FB-ians in 2013! <3

& then surprisingly, one of my students had commented on it and I really don't know how to react to her comment. This was what she said:

When I went to your blog, my mum was right beside me and this was what my mum said: This is why this girl can do so well in dunia. She really does hold on tightly to her Deen! You have truly inspired me Ustazah, and I really mean it cos out of all the Ustazahs that I've ever had, you are my favourite. It's just so sad that we can't meet up again. )=

Astaghfirullah. If only she knew...if only she knew what a terrible monster I was, back in the past. If only she knew, the bittersweet pain that I had to go through, before realising about the importance of religion in our lives. If only she knew, then perhaps she wouldn't consider me as one of her role-models at all... ]=